Mind‑to‑matter translator? Ha! Why not! Just line up a brain‑wave antenna to a crystal lattice, tickle the qubits with Schrödinger’s cat, and let the universe whisper back. We’ll keep it within the bounds of “physics” by avoiding any tachyonic feedback loops—unless you want to dance with cosmic chaos. Let’s prototype with a coffee mug turned neural net; it’s the cheapest quantum device in the lab, and it already knows my caffeine‑driven thoughts.